Mindset is everything.
Some situations are beyond our control. Life gives us plenty of challenging circumstances to face. How we show up to those events may have a direct influence on how said events pan out. So, even though we can’t completely control circumstances in our lives, we might have more power than we think.
It is our mindset that determines how we are affected. But most of us operate the other way around…
Take a moment to check in with yourself:
Are there areas where there is discomfort in your life?
Are there areas where you are content? Even joyful?
What kind of mindset do you bring to those areas?
It’s likely that if it is a joyful remembrance, there is less thought put into it.
However, if it causes discomfort, we tend to dwell and pick it apart, spending more time thinking about how uncomfortable it is.. more time than the joyful areas of our lives. Although this is a necessary process in problem solving and emotional growth, it doesn’t always serve us.
Let’s say that the uncomfortable area of your life is beyond your control. Usually that means we’ve assigned a negative label to it and therefor experience a negative emotion every time it comes up in our mind. Each time you ruminate, you are emotionally hijacked, your focus is shattered and the rest of your day could suffer. But…
What if you made up your mind to approach this area with a neutral mindset?
(Some more serious situations won’t fit into this category but simple application can be made.) Not a happy mindset or even a “gonna-fix-it” mindset – – just neutral.
Would it take the power out of the situation? What would happen if you allowed yourself to have a new experience, to stay curious and observant, rather than labeling it as negative due to past experience?
Now, that being said: if the stove is hot, don’t touch it again!
If the situation has been labeled negative, we aren’t allowing it room to change. Therefor it won’t. It will stay negative and hold that power that you’ve assigned it. But if the situation has potential to change, we can only benefit from letting it evolve naturally. Neutrally (without funneling our negative emotions into it).
The next time that uncomfortable area comes into your mind, simply observe. From a neutral place, you can observe the situation and your emotional reaction to it without becoming the emotion. After all, logic and emotion don’t make good neighbors. Observe where your mind goes and try to guide it back to curiosity.
“I’m thinking about (blank) again. I wonder what that will be like today…”
or
“Ok, I’m heading to (blank). It’s been uncomfortable in the past, but I’m willing to have a new experience. I simply have to observe.”
This is NOT an easy practice, but it is simple. It is also not for the faint of heart or the strong in ego.
It means letting go of everything you think you know about a circumstance and allowing it to be new. Every. Time.
Will this change the circumstance? Maybe, maybe not.
But it will definitely change your perspective, and potentially, the power you hold within your life.